Tragedy Strikes

This afternoon I came home from school like I do everyday. I looked out back and both the dogs were sleeping on the back porch. I went for my run, like I always do. I showered afterwards, like I always do. Then I headed outside to get the dogs so that they could get the mail with me, like we always do. Bear jumped up right away when he saw me. Hazel was still sleeping. I called her name. Once. Twice. Three times. I started to get worried. I bent down to shake her awake, but she was stiff and cold. "Hazel!" I heard myself yelling her name over and over but she wouldn't get up. I felt the awful truth fall over me. I ran inside sobbing. I called my dad, trying to tell him this tragedy but my words were incomprehensible through my crying. He confirmed Hazel's death when he got home. I could only sit there in shock, the tears dried on my face. He took her body to the vet for them to cremate her. 

I couldn't believe that she was just gone. No warning signs. She was barely six years old. No known health problems. Nothing. We have no idea how it happened. She was just taken from us. 

I distracted myself with homework in an attempt to fight back my despair. But, when I tried to go to sleep I couldn't stop all the thoughts from bombarding me. I'll never take her on another walk. I'll never see her chase the deer. I'll never watch her play and wrestle with Bear. I'll never get to see her fall asleep, her chew toy still in her mouth. I'll never get to do a lot of things with her and I hate that.

She was technically my sister's dog but that didn't stop me from loving her. I considered her my dog after my sister went off to college. I've never been an emotional person but right now I can't stop crying. She may have only been a pet, but at my age she may as well have been my version of a child. I helped raise her, train her, teach her to fetch and swim and shake.  I feel like a part of me died along with her. I know this will all get easier with time but every time I look at Bear now, I'm reminded of her. They were inseparable. Two peas in a pod. Its hard to look at Bear and know Hazel isn't right behind him. As tough as it is, its made me love Bear that much more. Knowing what could happen makes me want to give him all the love I can whenever I can. 

So, this is in memory of Hazel... I know she'll be sorely missed by my whole family.